Bacon! Fa! La! La!

Tomorrow marks the start of a new Christmas tradition. As soon as Birdie finishes final exams, we will drive to Crown Candy Kitchen to order BLTs for lunch. We haven't done this before, but as the plan involves bacon, in our family that pretty much has all the earmarks of a Fa! La! La! tradition. Bacon rules in our home. On Saturday mornings, Big Guy--the chief lover of bacon--fries an entire pound of it in the cast iron skillet. About half a pound reaches the table, and Big Guy still wants his share of it. Bacon is the only food that could break the five-second rule. A theoretical half-slice of bacon could lay on the kitchen floor for a week. Big Guy would sandpaper off whatever debris might have collected, fry it, and probably not share. Big Guy really likes his bacon. In fact, I'm pretty sure that when he departs for his heavenly future, his ashes will be rolled in bacon, deep fried and then spread over a field of lettuce, with tomato slices scattered. The only problem will be our daughters. I'm not sure they will allocate precious bacon to their dear dad's remains. Thankfully, that's a problem they--and Big Guy--have years to work out. I really like chocolate. So, tomorrow, after the rest of the family passes out from too many BLTs, I will search out some sort of chocolate. And eventually, when I go to my "great reward" I'm thinking about some sort of ash-laiden chocolate dip...or, no wait, I really like Autumn's caramel apples. Should I pass at the right time of the year, that would be a trick or treat for someone. Fa! La! La!